Which is nice. I’ll leave this for folks who would just like some music.

Is it like this for everyone? Like for each person we know a piece of our heart will be attached to that person , so each friend or any dear person will have a piece. ..the problem is when you lose somebody.

If that happen the part sticked to that person will be detached from rest of your heart tissue. .. An eternal scar will replace that part , however small that part be ,losing it ,is still so painful and it won’t be ever replaced or normal like what it has been before

I think it’s a fundamental question

Does really all this pain and loss and […]

Sand so hot on my feet.
You will never be mine.
I’ll meet you anyplace.

I’ll never find your garden.

Fuck the law for making those who suffer unbearably commit suicide alone. It’s really unjust…fuck society for either calling us cowards for not being able to commit suicide or selfish when we do.. how dare society hold this bullshit double standard over us..if there’s one thing in my death I believe it’s essential for euthanasia to be legalised in every country for those who wish to die for whatever reason, whether it’s because of personality disorders (Like me NPD) or for physical illness or any other reason.

I don’t get why physical illness is treated different to mental…fuck the law and society..I’ll forever be a coward […]

always get out of the hole to get sucked right back in. i mean nothing to anyone and im lying to myself if i think anyone will give a fuck when im dead.

A couple of years ago I had many attempts of suicide, since then I’ve been trying to get help. Everything gets in the way, stopping me from helping myself. I try and find reasons to start over new or someone for that matter. Now I feel numb and without a single care.

In our household music is everything. I push myself every night to add more and more hours onto my piano practice, until my hands cramp and I can’t play any longer. I sometimes get really angry where I pull at my hair and make my skin bleed, usually screaming my head off, there is […]

pulmo inundatus &_&

I miss 2012 lol reminiscing about unimportant things and time is so not my friend if I was caught but
no this was my first pof username. I was so young and stupid back then xD

Some people are lucky; Some people are not.
The more you learn about this world and society, the more you will realize that Life is random (chances), and yes, Life is not fair. Reality is depressing.

Most people who still always keep saying that “if you work hard, you will be successful!” are naive, ignorant, and simple-minded typical “optimistic/positive/happy-go-lucky” people you always see everywhere. And even for those people who realized it and therefore said that what’s important is to “work smart”, it also usually often means to be sly, cunning, opportunistic bastards who are too often selfish, pricks, ruthless, cold, heartless, and only care about […]

Hello all.

It’s been a long time since I have postedon here. If you’re a longtime goer of this site, you may remember me.

Just wanted to pop in and say hello again and that I’m still around.

crying wouldn’t get the things out.

If you ever had those Asian meat and veggie stews, there’s a layer of oil floating on top of the sauce and liquid, and at the bottom of the sauce there are grains and clumps of food. When you drain the oil out, the clumps are still in the bowl, more compact, nothing changes. Tearing up is only draining the oil out.

I hate this, I hate how I’m in a constant conflict with myself, and I’m always the one at fault, since I’m fighting myself, I can’t win. Something really trivial happened and just triggered everything back. at least im not […]

i am sinful. i drink until i pass out. i smoke up until i cant think. i cheat and lie. i selfharm until i feel the pain for days. i dont deserve to live.

yes, this shit is a soul cancer, depression is even worse than body cancer, it kills your soul , and once ur soul is dead, u are dead even if ur body keeps moving. and thats where we start thinking of commiting suicide cuz thats the only option we see, we are dead, so we want to kill the only thing left which is the body.

that bing said , i hope i dont reach that stage , am getting worse evveryday but am trying to fight back even tho i lose most of my battles vs depression, anxiety, overthinking and negativity .  i am having […]

Has anyone else been caught in the process of committing suicide? I waited 12 years to commit and then was caught before I could shoot myself. I don’t know why I am still alive, I have no other reason except for this. I don’t even have loved ones and the people who caught me were actually the people I’ve always hated the most, lol, and I would die in order to flee. Gross. I believe these are also the folks who have raped me 195 times since 2016.

Sooo… I learned that you can only commit suicide unless you have one of the predicating factors involved in suicide as a motive. Factors such as being a jilted lover, feeling like a burden, the typical shit.

Thing is, many of these factors are much less tragic than some of the things we go through. But suicide is a very specific process, I guess, and unless you have one of those factors motivating you, you probably ain’t gonna be able to commit suicide.

Suicide is apparently a very specific phenomena, and as such, you can’t simply just run off and commit suicide with ease.

Once I learned I […]

I’m sorry if there is any North Koreans are reading this, but I think this is the best way to describe my life. 3 years ago, me and my family moved to New Zealand and since then I was severely abused. My parents won’t let me out of the house, and the only 2 places I could go is home and school. I have limited internet access so I’m writing this very quickly (before my parents found out). It got worse last September, when my parents slapped me in the face 4 times in a row because they forced me to do a LOT of […]

Ive been on this site a while reading everyone else’s thoughts, I would have said so much to all of you but I didn’t want to register.
I’ve been struggling with thoughts of suicide since I was 14, I am now about to turn 30 so it’s been more than half my life. I attempted at 16, as much as one can attempt to shoot oneself without pulling the trigger before getting caught. The good news is that the past 7 years were an easy fight, I felt purposeful and had a job I loved, but now that job feels like a cage and I […]

How do you ground yourself?

For me, by watching TED talks and journaling and going here to this website for overly sad humans.

Once again I’m here to read ppl’s agony. It grounds me whenever I have suicidal thoughts. It’s tragic to know that people are there for you but eventually they’ll get tired of your shit and toxcitity then leave you knowing that it would make you misery. Makes me want to kill myself more. I know that I don’t have to depend on people and get their validation but it’s hard not to when you rlly love those ppl around you. I feel like a burden. Always have been. I blame myself for everything and for the existence I found no purpose and not thankful for. […]

I now avoid this place because it kinda brings me moredown than the hope and light I feel I can bring to it. But I don’t know where else I can write this and keep it somewhat personal.
I feel like people love me. And that is good. I was so afraid people hated me and couldn’t stand me. I feared people wanted to kill me even. At some point the paranoia had taken over me, but it wasn’t true. I’m not a monster. I’m not evil. I’m not that horrible of a human being despite how I may have felt. There’s people who love […]

If it’s cowardice that’s stopping me, is that something I should try to overcome? Would that even be possible?

If it’s because I don’t want to devastate my parents, then why isn’t that enough to motivate me to get my shit together and do what I need to to survive?

If I’m always going to be alone, and the main purpose of life is connection with others, then what’s the point in continuing?

If I’m an unforgivably terrible person, and the world would be better off without me, then why aren’t I doing the right thing and ending it?

If my mind generates high levels of emotional suffering, and […]