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2

Last words

May 23rd, 2018by Morbidcrow

To whom it may concern –

If you’re reading this – it’s already too late. I’ve lived long enough – arguably on borrowed time. I can’t remember a time in my life when I wanted to exist. I’ve only stayed around as long as I have for the sake of others. I haven’t lived for myself because I never wanted that. The world seems hell-bent on torturing me and leeching my sanity day by day. Please – don’t feel guilty. Do not question what you could have done to prevent this because the short answer is that there is nothing you could have done.. Do not …

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1

Gone

May 23rd, 2018by Slbs98

“No matter how hard you try, you cant escape your past.”

It’s funny how words from a video game could cut so damn deep. I still struggle with what all has happened, and if I were the victim, or the aggressor.

Let me take you back to 3 years ago when I was 16.  My Junior year was already looking like a wash on its own, and the divorce wasn’t exactly good for my already damaged psyche. The one thing i had going for me was that i had made an online friend the summer prior who I talked to every day. He made me feel like …

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3

Anyone ever do charcoal grill in the car?

May 23rd, 2018by JBone

Why not?

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1

s l u t t t

May 23rd, 2018by lovvely

hey. I’ve been MIA for awhile, oops, sorry. Everything is fucked. Sorry if you emailed me and I didn’t reply. I’ll try to be on here and talk with you lot as much as possible :,) (the email is ollies2@educbe.ca)

The school year is almost finished, thank god, but I’m dreading going into grade nine. I’ve been clean for quite awhile, but the urges to cut and attempt for my 4th time just become much more strong each day. I’m so done with trusting people and have them turn against me. I trust no one. All of my so call “friends” leave me in my darkest …

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1

I am new here

May 23rd, 2018by AmandaSucks

I have always been able to best express myself through writing so I figured I would try to join a community like this.  I need something.  Not sure what… well actually I am sure because I have been around the block several times.  I need medication regulation and therapy… maybe some CBT or DBT to help kick start things…The problem is I own my own business and I can’t leave it.  I can’t just take a month or two off like I did when I was going to school or working for someone with benefits and FMLA…  I just can’t.  I cancelled 3 of my …

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0

Melodramatic probably

May 23rd, 2018by velveteennightingale

I thought maybe I was cured.  Yes, I had lapses of joy and life and days that endlessly sucked, but I thought maybe the worst was behind me.  I started to refer to myself (in secret) as someone who used to cut, who used to be depressed. I started to become comfortable with my body at the place I dance, even exposing my hundreds of scars. But then the dance year ended and everything hit me in an inescapable wave again. I am tired of fucking change. The people I trust, the ways I have grown in the dance place, all of that is gone …

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2

It’s hard to explain

May 23rd, 2018by Zigzag

A good day on the outside, but inside Im wreaked. Ive gotten a lot of work done, and Im ahead of everyone else in my class. A depressive rush of energy resulting from a deep sense of inferiority. I cant enjoy my day though. Im doing so well, but my head is in Hell. Good things are there, but Im empty still. Its hard to explain. All of the pain is worse on days when Im doing well externally, bc it makes life seem that much more pointless.

 

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3

May 23rd, 2018by soapandwasser

what’s so precious about a human’s life that suicide is seen as evil?

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3

May 23rd, 2018by soapandwasser

A part of me feel like I deserved to be battered to pulp for being so useless.  At least physical pain would look as real as it feels so.

I wished my partner would just physically hurt me. Him or someone else.

He just wouldn’t. He wouldn’t even slap me across the face if I ask him to.

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10

Im a coward

May 23rd, 2018by definitelyworried

My mind is all messed up right now, I can’t find the courage to kill myself and I don’t want to live tomorrow.

Had the noose around my neck a few times this week but can’t go through with it. It’s a weird feeling.

I still feel suicide is inevitable, and I don’t know why I can’t just finish it.

Maybe it could be a very small amount of hope that is keeping me alive, but what a disaster to have a false sense of hope.

Dying now would be better than to experience more failure.

 

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2

The Truman show

May 23rd, 2018by Blugirl16

Have you guys ever heard of the Truman delusion? I used to believe I was in a reality TV show just like he did, and thought everyone in the world were just characters in the storyline with me being the leading star, heard that delusion is a symptom of schizophrenia, may be schizophrenic who knows, everything is totally cool in my brain.
Tonight I’m having a wonderful time, crawled up in bed with the covers over me, scared sh*tless, thinking I’m in some kind of stimulation, and now I am hallucinating? Does anyone know if …

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11

Do suicide chat lines help?

May 22nd, 2018by Shoo01

Has anybody ever tried those crisis numbers? What was your experience, did it help u?

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1

Too Sage And Laila

May 22nd, 2018by thepersonnobodyknows

I cannot BELIEVE you two were depressed. You two directed me too this right away. I wish I could still be there with you guys. You know that. But what you don’t know is that.. I am planning to commit suicide next month. I am gonna miss you. Are you guys still doing that too? When are you going to do it?

I will not tell you why I am doing this. I am never going to tell you why. All I can tell you is that its an act of force. Man, I wish you could see my face right now. I’m almost drowned in

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0

May 22nd, 2018by soapandwasser

I’m so disconnected from everyone around me, or my friends that I can barely make a good joke anymore. It’s sad.

I want to be funny. Making people laugh is fun. I guess this is what happens when I delete people who share the same level of humour with me to stay with comforting, warm, unfunny people because I can’t handle having too much friends.

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2

I don’t want to even exist anymore

May 22nd, 2018by the low point 1090

I’m not gonna sit here n say that my life was the crappiest because I know that people have it way worse then I have and I should be considered lucky compared to others. The root of the problem would be when I was younger I went from care home to care home but it wasn’t the worst experience. I remember waiting for my mum to get me, looking out the window waiting for my mum to come get me. Everything someone walked by I’d think that it’s her but every time it wasn’t. I want there for that long only a few years but …

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6

It would be a relief to know u had access to painless euthanasia

May 22nd, 2018by Shoo01

I understand why they don’t allow people to have access to easy death but it would be a relief to know that if your life is totally fucked and you have no hope of any decent future that you could go in peace and prepare your ending. Many people now do not have the types of family support and economic stability that allows you to plan appropriately for old age because of the decimation of the nuclear family and the extended family. Nobody wants to die really young but in modern times I think you should be allowed to especially if u have no young …

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12

Permanent pain from psychiatrists butchery

May 22nd, 2018by Agonizing

I’ve tried many times today to commit stinking suicide, I dont have the strength to see it through, I close my eyes with my neck in the noose, feel the pressure build, shut my eyes and wish I was dead, then I feel I havent got the will power to see it through, and remain alive, seeing the impossible and worthless journey ahead because the suicide failed. When taking the noose off in a stunned state, moreso because im brain fucked, I said to myself “Im in hell” while I had an image of the evil sob psychiatrist Dr Thomas Fox that did this to …

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0

Sources of people who have helped me understand the world better

May 22nd, 2018by Shoo01

All of these guys can be found on YouTube: for all the young pple who are struggling to make sense of our society. I recommend a few people who have woke me up and at least helped guide me to understanding why I’m depressed or struggling in general. Stefan Molyneux, Jordan B. Peterson, Richard Grannon were a few who helped me understand why my life hasn’t turned out so good. But if u can kind of understand what is going on with u, you get some relief and understand it’s not all your fault in some cases. We live in a highly propagandized society that …

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4

Weird question

May 22nd, 2018by wanted85

I know other people cut im a cutter when I’m going through a lot. But a thought popped into my head what would happen if I just stabbed myself once? I have a lot of fat so it really wouldn’t do anything other than hurt is what I’m thinking. Any thoughts on this?

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1

Alone, but not really alone

May 22nd, 2018by nooneimportant15

I have a problem with saying I am alone. I feel so alone, but I have people around me, but they just don’t get it. When I try to talk to them and explain it to them they seem to get angry. Or sometimes they just get really upset and it makes me feel worse.

I am at the point where I am keeping all these thoughts and feelings inside my head and it’s not really doing me any good. At some points, they overflow and come out. Usually, it’s an explosion though, like, an overload of all types of feelings. I am tired of getting …

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