It appears that I haven’t died in a plane crash. So I’m still alive. Meh, I say.

(Photo taken by visual eyes. Story written by Hope Dream Love)

The green, luscious yard. The vibrant trees filled with yellows and oranges. Reds and browns. The concrete walkway with the occasional blade of grass in between the cracks. All topped off with the Mansion on Eerie Street. It’s attic window cracked. The masonite siding slowly stripping away from the house. Front door hanging off its hinges, just enough for you to see beyond the door to the stairs leading to the second floor where, it happened.

It was a stormy night in the midst of hurricane season. The worst storm in centuries. The wind and […]

I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I want to die I […]

Murphy’s law Sucks! For the most part.

However there are positive variations of it.

I know most of you don’t know my story. I’ve had major health problems and many surgeries. I am now facing another major surgery. I’m trying to figure out a way to die during this one. I think I have one.

I’m growing tired of living in this body. I can’t seem to get a break.

Sorry for the rant. I should be a big girl and just face this, but I’m so tired.

Ok thanks for putting all of my comments in the trash, I see I’m not welcome here. Bye. Take care everyone…

I resent my parents so much, my dad is a bad person, hateful, judgemental, ignorant, arrogant, racist, narcissistic, a piece of work. I can’t wait for him to be dead. When that time comes I will feel like a huge burden have been lifted. I will no longer will have to pretend to care or listen to his idiocracies. One less person I have to pretend to care about. There are just not enough people in my family that I care for, and that is sad. I honestly dislike most of them, they were extremely mean to me and my sibling growing up, they were […]

It feels so lonely right now. I’m at work, have a family, people around me and yet I feel alone, so alone. Tired of living, which it is become more of a chore than a joy. I want to go to sleep and never wake up again, never.

im going to start with yes anyone can have depression but im going to be talking about the way people use the word “depression” and the things they complain about.

first the way they use it: “omg im sooooo depressed today” wrong. you are SAD. even better in most cases i find its not even sad its a tantrum because your mommy didnt get you that $2000 phone. if that is your biggest problem in life i dont want to hear it. im happy with a $20 phone that has so many cracks the screen is cutting your fingers (ok i broke the screen myself […]

How are people able to go so long hiding self-harm scars? I just simply don’t understand. I just want to know more about this. I mean I’ve done it before but never have been able to hide it for very long. How do people hide it for so long?

I don’t want to hear it from someone with a privileged background.

I got back from Thailand a couple hours ago, It cost me 2400 au dollars and about 700 spending.

I went to celebrate my eighteenth birthday with my friends as I had saved up the money and did know what to do with it.

before going into detail about my trip I wanna talk about my life so around 3 months ago, I was washing dishes probably the millionth one in my time at my local tavern as I was a kitchen hand. I wanted a no brains job so I could think about uni studies whilst I worked and in slow times I would write important […]

I’m tired from the pain of my soul, from other things

I’m going overseas soon for a few days.. I hope I die in a plane crash…

What do you do when you are at the end?

The end could mean anything, really.

The end of your hopes.

The end of a relationship.

The end of optimism.

I sit back here, alone with my musings, as I always have and I find myself going back to the phrase ‘Memento Mori’, which means ‘Remember that you have to die’.

It wants you to reflect upon your mortality. And I do this. A lot.

Except, with a mind half twisted, it drags me down whenever I am at the end of something.

If I am going to die anyway, why must I suffer the time in between. I am sure […]

Booked a ticket on a whim to fly somewhere. Oops. I regret it. Oh well lol, I’d better go. I did kind of want to go there anyway…

Maybe it will be some nice prep for when I see my LDR boyfriend irl. I have not been overseas in years. I don’t like all the mucking around that comes with flying.

August is a bit over a month away, this is when I’ll see my LDR boyfriend again in person… if I last that long. I don’t want to wait that long :/ what if something bad happens to me between now and then????

I don’t really even […]

I’m an alcoholic. I hate it so much because I feel like have no control over my feelings and how I react to certain things. I only drink because I’m so anxious all the time. I wish I could just relax but I take everything so negatively. People like to tease me at work and so I use alcohol as a way to relax and laugh it off but its starting to get pricey as well as unhealthy. I haven’t gone a day without drinking in months now…maybe a couple years. Its every day. And my tolerance keeps getting greater and greater. I know what […]

I can’t bring myself to consciously cut open my own skin, but I found out that I CAN play knife roulette–and the cuts I receive with each slip-up feel much better. Additionally, if anyone asks about the scars, I can just tell them about my “parlor trick”.